58 Things Social Media Newbies Say & Maybe You Said, Too!?
There comes a time in life when you must acknowledge social media, Facebook, Twitter, LinkedIn are all here to stay. Yes, the social network platforms may change. Facebook will eventually become the Myspace of yesterday. However, one thing is certain, social media, mobile phones, iPad evolution and technology in general is not going away.
At one point in time we all still are, were or will be newbies at something. It’s funny to think back to the first day you tweeted or joined Facebook. I joined Facebook in 2006 when I worked at Sun Microsystems. We were required to get on Facebook in support of an internal big marketing conference. I remember thinking how awkward it was to be so transaparent and have everyone from family, friends, neighbors, girlfriends, past boyfriends, teachers, boss and hubby all in one place! Yowza!
My how things have changed. Now we share our life, our ups and downs in 140 characters on Twitter, in pictures on Pinterest, on blog posts like this and of course on Facebook.
Learning all the bits, bytes, lingo and lango is not always easy. The best thing to do is ask the questions you have, answer the ones you know and have fun. Yes, we do social media for business. However, once in awhile ya’ have to laugh a little or even a lot.
Below are some quotes I have heard many newbies say including some folks close to me in life and business. I hope you can have some fun with this and add your own. We’re working on a video to incorporate some of them with a couple clients. If your suggestion makes it in the video, we’ll give you credit for it in the video and accompanied description!
Note: By no means is this post meant to make fun of social newbies. We love newbies around these parts. We were all a newbie at some point and will be a newbie tomorrow when the next new shiny bright object launches!
58 Things Social Newbies Say & Maybe You Said Too!?
1. None of my customers are on social, seriously.
2. I don’t have time. I’m too busy selling. I attend networking groups 3 mornings and 5 nights of the week.
3. Facebook is only for kids.
4. I have a Facebook page but nobody talks to me. My customers are all introverts.
5. I can’t do social. No way. I like my double personality lifestyle.
6. Twitter… That sounds like the perfect platform to tweet coupon codes!
7. Twitter is for dumb birds who can’t talk in more than 140 character bytes.
8. LinkedIn is for the jobless and bored.
9. Shut up! My website is savvy! We just added a twitter button.
10. What do you mean listen on social? Where is the sound button?
11. Hashtag, hash brown same thing right? I’ll take the hash brown, thank you.
12. I tweeted!!
13. No way, no sirreee! I am not tweeting what I had for lunch!
14. What do you mean tweet you later?? I’ll call you at 4:00 pm et. Want me to setup a conference line?
15. Did I just tweet?
16. Dude, you can’t say that on twitter!
17. Ahhhh my mom doesn’t even know what twitter is. Yes!
18. Is it a tweet or a twit?
19. What is the difference between a tweet, twit, retweet and reheat?
20. Seriously, just call me. I don’t have a smart phone like you.
21. Oooh. He is giving me a hand massage. I got tweeter fingers after sending all those tweets today.
22. Said after first retweet: “Stop, collaborate and listen I’m the tweeter who’s got their attention!”
23. DM me baby. Hey, that sounds cool, doesn’t it?
24. Why do you I look so tired? It’s that darn Twitter bird keeping me up every night.
25. I got a retweet! Woot!
26. That twitter bird is crazy!
27. Me addicted to twitter? Never!!
28. Twitter is for people who don’t have a life.
29. How am I suppose to say anything in this tiny little box and only 140 characters?
30. Said while looking at timeline: “Look! All these people sent me tweets!”
31. I tweeted again!
32. What’s my password?
33. I think I’ll go back to Facebook
34. What if my competitors see what we say?
35. Did he really just tweet that?
36. Woah! I just found out my best customer is on Twitter. Who woulda thunk?
37. Cool, I’ll just send all my tweets to Facebook & Facebook posts to tweets and will be all set!
38. How do I get one of those cool influence scores?
39. How do I get that verified badge? I’m a pretty popular guy. I’m gonna need one!
40. What’s wrong with that lil egg as my profile picture? It’s cute!
41. I need to use my real face? Why would I do that? Then I can’t stalk anyone.
42. Facebook, nobody is on Facebook anymore.
43. Google+? That’s where I go to search for stuff on the internet, right?
44. Be careful out there on that internet. I heard there are ripoff scammers.
45. Video? Why would anyone want to watch a video when we have phone & in person.
46. Blogging? That would mean I have to engage and listen!
47. Let my sales reps on social? Are you kidding?
48. My sales reps don’t have time for social. They are busy cold calling and door to door knocking.
49. We can’t let people comment on our blog. What if someone says something bad?
50. Email? Why would I want to integrate email into a social media campaign?
51. Call to action? Why would I call someone to take action? What action?
52. We are on social. We have a Twitter and Facebook account. Haven’t logged on in a few months but we are definitely a social company!
53. Community manager? What is that? Don’t need one of those as nobody talks to us.
54. What do you mean by social listening? Nobody says anything on our Facebook page so nothing to listen to!
55. Yes! I got followers! Social media success!!
56. I got 25 Facebook likes. We are rockin!
57. I seriously think Facebook might save our business this year!
58. Will you plllleeeaaase retweet this?
Half marketing, half geek, social media addict, CEO & Founder of Marketing Nutz @MktgNutz, entrepreneur, speaker, trainer, coach. Lover of strategy, ROI, Brand, God, Family, Friends, Beach & Life! 15+ years of experience helping small startups to Fortune 100 companies, budgets teeny tiny to big in both B2B and B2C markets build brand awareness, grow new markets, develop communities and master ...
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